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Story Of My Life

Every day, in the mornings when my alarm goes off, even getting up out of bed takes an enormous effort. It highly affected the entire me, I was so lazy. I had a bad temper. Counting the remaining hours of the day until it’s time to sleep. Sleep was my escape. Until it all comes down and got worse, I was very impatient. Hot-headed. I lost confidence and somehow felt like I was doing everything wrong. I have been taking anti-depressants for years already after the loss of our daughter, and after the coma, my body struggled after. After I lost her, it felt like I lost my purpose. I lost my purpose as a woman. After physically losing a part of me, my uterus and ovaries, it has to be removed because of an infection. I also felt like I lost my womanhood.

In wanting so much to have kids, we tried another option.
We did surrogacy in America. Our first surrogate was pregnant with twins but unfortunately, after 6 weeks we discovered it has no heartbeat. But we never lose hope. We decided to try it again for the second time around, after trying 2 times and failing. Our precious dream to have a baby was over. It hurts but I let myself go. I let myself go and didn’t think of the people surrounding me, the people who loved me. I hid from the world, went inside my shell, and closed people off. I was petrified of what would people perceive about me if I posted too much on social media.

Every day, in the mornings when my alarm goes off, even getting up out of bed takes an enormous effort. It highly affected the entire me, I was so lazy. I had a bad temper. Counting the remaining hours of the day until it’s time to sleep. Sleep was my escape. Until it all comes down and got worse, I was very impatient. Hot-headed. I lost confidence and somehow felt like I was doing everything wrong. I have been taking anti-depressants for years already after the loss of our daughter, and after the coma, my body struggled after. After I lost her, it felt like I lost my purpose. I lost my purpose as a woman. After physically losing a part of me, my uterus and ovaries, it has to be removed because of an infection. I also felt like I lost my womanhood.

In wanting so much to have kids, we tried another option.
We did surrogacy in America. Our first surrogate was pregnant with twins but unfortunately, after 6 weeks we discovered it has no heartbeat. But we never lose hope. We decided to try it again for the second time around, after trying 2 times and failing. Our precious dream to have a baby was over. It hurts but I let myself go. I let myself go and didn’t think of the people surrounding me, the people who loved me. I hid from the world, went inside my shell, and closed people off. I was petrified of what would people perceive about me if I posted too much on social media.

I have dysorthography and it’s very difficult to write things, especially English. I write a lot of mistakes due to my dysorthography. But that did not stop me to share my story. I’d like to share it in English better. Before I decided to share this, there were a lot of hesitations in the beginning. Every time I’d say “Yes, I’m going to do this” it seems there’s a little voice stopping me, saying “No, you don't” but I didn't let that stop me. I said “ Stop it now, I’m gonna do it, And yes I did it. I did it anyway despite having a language barrier. I did it in a language that I did not grow up in. I was anxious and afraid of making mistakes and that people would laugh at me but I did not let that stop me.

And hey look, by doing this, I feel so good! I feel so much better! It felt like the big weight from my chest has been lifted and washed over.
Now, I’m finally making a breakthrough with my business! This community has helped me a lot of things. It helped me feel more confident and overcome my fears. I’m looking forward to the future best! ❤️

#bestbusinessever

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